The other day I pushed my car to see how empty it can get. I haven’t done that in a long time. Usually as soon as it dings or gets close to that red area, more gas is added and filled. With the memory issues and whatnot I’m not the best at remembering to look when it gets halfway or I’d be the guy who fills up when it gets to half now. I lived wondering if I was going to make it long enough, I like having one less thing to stress about.
It’s a stark contrast from where I used to be. I was living in the red for a very long time. For those of you that have or do live there, the phrase:
“It’s cool, I know my car.”
For some it’s a familiar one. Passengers see the car is close to empty and helpfully point it out as if you haven’t been watching; making that decision - some rice and meat or a few more gallons? Who will run out of energy first, me or the car? Most of the time the car wins, you can make it a few more days.
Now you are living in the red with your energy systems. Fatigue has set in and recouping that energy becomes as important as getting a few more drops out of the pump. Mood isn’t great, and irritability sets in.
If you’re in this place your finances are likely in the red as well. You have more going out than you do coming in and you’re getting by, barely. You’re never really up, just barely close to even if you’re lucky.
Sometimes you can get that tank full, and now that it’s full you’re not keeping that same routine you’re doing all the extra things you didn’t have time for. The only problem is now you’re right back in the red. You didn’t refill at half a tank, you’re used to being in the red so half was still double what you’re used to working with so you think you’re still good.
You’re used to living in the red, that’s your normal. The half tank and full tank feel great but they are not familiar. That red line is familiar. That’s where you’ve been, you know how to at least survive. You haven’t learned to manage that full tank. You do all the extra things you can’t do before with that gas tank on E, now you can “catch up” - right it’s always a game of “catch up.” Somehow that tank got back to that red line just as quickly as the few dollars you normally throw in.
The real idea you might want to consider is the next time you get a full tank you don’t play make up, you keep your routine the same. This allows you the room to fill up your other “tanks.” If you don’t overdo it when you get a full tank, that tank can last you much longer. You have room to breathe.
You can lower your stress level and fill up your personal tank. Get better rest, instead of doing extra running around you can take some time to know you have the ability to get things done. You can map it into your current routine instead of cramming it into one big push to get things done.
The goal would be to try to learn to live at that half a tank mindset, but maybe you’ll need to learn to manage a quarter of a tank over the red first. Some people take smaller steps, that’s ok everyone can end up at a similar destination - just a different pace. The idea is to not learn to live on the edge but recognize when you need a refill.
Sure you’ll have times in life when you might get to the redline, but hopefully by then it’s a calculated choice. Hopefully you’ll have the ability to be out of the red if you wanted but you’re working on something that just takes a little more out than usual. Luckily you know you can survive, better still you know you don’t have to.
Then when you see that red it’s not stressful, it’s something you know you can pull yourself right out of. You can fill up anytime but you’re on a mission and will get to it when you absolutely have to, not worry if you can’t when you absolutely have to.
One more trick is to change the size of your tank - a smaller tank needs less gas. Say no more to things that drain your energy but don’t feel your tank. Find ways to be more “fuel efficient” in your life. My car turns itself off at red lights to conserve energy, learn to relax when there’s time to stop and take a few minutes. A few minutes to close your eyes, breathe in slowly, and appreciate the good in your life can do wonders.
If you’re living in the red right now, it doesn’t mean you failed. You’re a survivor. Just remember you’re allowed to live above the red line. You don’t have to just survive.